I’m Not a Normal Woman

Posted on January 10, 2011 by Francesca De Grandis

10/2011 Update: Blog-time is bendable. I posted this blog Jan 2011. It was written Dec 2010. The blog says it is “from my upcoming book.” Now the book is out. It is called Share My Insanity. And now the blog:  

When It Comes to Romance, I’m Not a Normal Woman
Dec 2010. From my upcoming book.  

Years ago, I attended a luthiers’ convention (luthiers build stringed instruments). I walked into the main exhibition hall, and went into a dead heat. Not because of all the fine dudes there. It was because of the guitars! I was stunned—completely shocked—to find out I could feel that way about them. But it was then I realized, I am not like other women! 

My relationships with my guitars and my mandolin just ain’t right. 

Multiple Sclerosis (that’s as close as we’ve gotten to a diagnosis) has made holding a guitar too difficult. I really missed it. (I name my guitars. My vintage Gibson semi-hollow-body electric was called Blondie. She’s living in Arizona now with a drummer.) One day, a friend dropped by, after a gig, toting a mando. I asked, “Put that in my lap, will you?” (It can be too hard for me to reach for things.)  Lo, its weight was not too much on my thighs, and it was not too big for me to bend my torso around. 

Blondie in the arms of someone new

Blondie in the arms of someone new

An aside: I found out later it’s a really small, lightweight mando; if any other had arrived that day, I would not be playing mandolin now, because it would have been like guitars—too heavy, and too large to wrap myself around. I guess God AKA randomness was looking out for me. Trust the flow, Luke. The flow of events in your day, that is. There are gifts all around, if you watch the moment by moment with the understanding that it is God. There is only God, and God is now. There is only now, and now is God. And She will always take care of you. Every moment. 

I usually wouldn’t have asked to be passed a mando. I assumed I couldn’t manage it physically. But just couldn’t stop myself! Again, lo, it turned out way great—unlike some guys I dated whom I thought I could manage! Maybe my impulsively saying, “Put that on my lap, will you?” was a bit of the Divine too. The Gods of Chaos do use every part of a person toward Their agenda of us having immense joy. 

Back to the story: My friend offered to lend the mandolin to me. However, it was his Dad’s. I insisted I could not accept it. But deep down, I’d fallen in love. I was lusting after another man’s mando! I mean, that’s actually how it felt to me, like I was breaking the tenth commandment, “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife” (or his musical instruments either, in my case! Oh, wait, now that I think of it: The full version of that commandment isn’t solely about wives. It’s also about coveting property. If craving someone else’s belongings is so rampant that Jehovah had to make a commandment against it, maybe I’m little normal). 

My friend would not take no for an answer. I finally accepted his kind offer. But honest-to-goddess, I felt I was cheating with his wife! 

Since then, he’s generously given me the mandolin. The mando and I have a legitimate relationship now. I am not normal. 

And recently, there is my crush on Jacquard products. I won some of them in the TeeJuice contest (www.teejuice.com). Called Jacquard a few times to ask something about their merchandise. In maybe my second phone call, I suddenly found myself asking if they had a job opening. 

They had no position available, and it was a crazy request. I have a job. And am not suited temperamentally to hold any position there. Besides, they’re in California, I’m in Pennsylvania. Plus I’m too disabled to go to an office. (I break easily. Seventy percent of the time I’d leave the house, I’d end up injured. So I happily live, love, and work, all at home.) 

But I was acting impulsively because I’d fallen in love—with product. And with a company of really cool people. I wanted to be part of that family. 

I still do, and am trying to make it happen. (Is this a courtship?) I figured one way I could contribute to their work would be as a writer. I submitted three articles to them (they accepted the third! Yaya!). I mention Jacquard products on this site for free. I will keep offering articles. 

Another reason I adore this company is that I owe them big-time! In July or August 2010, their products taught me that I can draw ‘n’ paint. Doing so has been a huge blessing to me. More about this is in my blog “I Can Draw? Huh?“ 

So Jacquard started an adventure for me. They’re a bunch of people whom I perceive as doing something remarkable: the highest quality product, highest quality service, and genuine caring. Their TeeJuice contest is generous with prizes. I rely on it for some of my art supplies. I get to have the best possible stuff, which I could not otherwise afford. I want to be part of all this, support it any way I can. When someone has a project I think highly of, I tend to get involved, do my bit to support it. I also want to give back to them for all they’ve given me.  

Still, a love affair with an inventory and a group of people is odd, no matter how amazing the merchandise or how awesome the people. (Today I got some Lumiere paint. It looked good enough to eat, yum!) It’s ridiculous. Aren’t I supposed to feel this way about a man? Or woman? Or polyamourous group? Is something wrong with me? Or am I instead passionate, focused, and capable of being in love with all of life? Yes, I like that explanation better. 

Chosing colors of Jacquard's Pearl Ex to paint a doily

Chosing colors of Jacquard's Pearl Ex to paint a doily

Afterthoughts 

1) As a mystic on an ecstatic path, I really do find myself in love with all of life. There are moments of connectivity to individuals, or to a group I’m teaching (and in the latter instance, I’m also feeling connection with each person). Or during one of the spiritual practices I’ve created comes the experience of bonding with all the dots in the connect-the-dots painting that is the cosmos. And during all these unions, I am in love. 

It’s part and parcel of what I realized long ago: I’m in love with my closest friends. But it isn’t a bad thing. I adore them, worship them, try to treat them as a beloved. It’s wonderful for them. And for me. 

This style of friendship is not something I chose; it’s just how I innately do things, before I even recognized what I was doing. In case you misunderstand, I’m not talking about wanting to make love with them, nor do I put someone on a pedestal or otherwise set myself up for short, disappointing alliances. I am a loyal friend, with lifelong friendships. But they have a strong element of romance. 

The world is my divine beloved. 

2) Some people live happiest single, some married, and some do well with altogether different options. 

One of my particular gifts as a spiritual teacher and counselor is to help people live their authentic self. So I’m able to guide them to choices other than my own. When I couple counsel, I rock! Yet I am single. Women who come to me looking for the dream mate repeatedly end up happily and long-term married. 

We all have our own path; supporting each other along it is not about being identical. It’s about honoring the Divine Spark shining in each of us, by respecting whatever supposedly bizarre crazy way it manifests. 

When it comes to romance, that might mean helping each other create new ways of being married, of being single, and of being everything in between. 

——————
Check out Share My Insanity.

Posted in Art, Writing, and Music, Community, Spirit, The Whole Thing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

A Fairy Party

Posted on January 4, 2011 by Francesca De Grandis

Detail from A doodle Is a Faerie Geometry Lesson. Silk Painting Picture-Poem, Francesca De Grandis

Probably 11/2010, I was leading a group, and trying to help us all relax better during mid-holiday frenzies. So I asked, “What do elves do on their day off?” to provide a role model. I told the groups’ members to each pick one thing an elf would do on their day off, and to do it.

Holidays may be over, but some of us (moi!) need to keep learning about self-care. The above exercise is useful any time of year. 

However, before I gave them the exercise, I read them the piece below:

A Fairy Party
June 18, 2005

Imagine you’re walking through the woods. And it becomes stranger and stranger, not in a bad way, though it is definitely so out of the ordinary that it might frighten you. The woods seem . . . well, magical. The color of tree leaves are brighter than you’d ever thought possible. Branches are more sharply defined, as if your eyesight suddenly improved vastly. The air is still, yet somehow also buzzing with a sense of expectancy. Shadows hold secret wonders. And though there is nothing evil about all this, you know in your gut that you should still be careful, in case you inadvertently trespass on a secret meeting of wood gnomes. So you’re a bit worried.

Then, as you come to a clearing, your fear vanishes. In the meadow ahead, there is a tiny cottage. It is everything a magical cottage should be. And, deep down, you know that, as tempting and wondrous as this dwelling is, it is absolutely not the work of Hansel and Gretel’s evil witch, or of any other malevolent being. You know it is the home of someone very special. Could it be where Glinda the good witch lives? Or where a young loving mother is raising a child in humble circumstances, a child who will grow up to be a great hero in a mythic tale? Who inhabits this hidden place, tucked away in an enchanted forest?

You go up to the door to find out, hoping it will not be an intrusion if you knock. And you see the following sign posted there:
 
Today’s Optional Reading for My Front Door
 
There once was a fairy who wanted to be like Santa’s elves—fairies whose happy work blesses many people. So she started working away, in her own way, by creating spells with which people could fulfill their dearest wishes. But though they were grateful to have health and wealth and happiness, the fairy herself became very ill. Too sick to even wash her own dishes.

You see, fairies need a lot of fun to stay healthy. They get unwell when they forget to play. Our fairy’s dreams about helping humans—the way ol’ Saint Nick’s elves do—made her work so hard she forgot to have fun.

She had not realized that Santa’s elves . . . well, bluntly . . . ignored their tasks a lot. A lot! Not in a mean-spirited way; they were just constantly distracted by the urge to sing, or the opportunity for a teasing jest. Not to mention the scent of hot cocoa that dictated one immediately drop whatever one was doing to consume chocolate. (With marshmallows in it!)

On and on, all day, the North Pole sprites spent more time playing than making toys—which made for better toys than all the hammering, nailing, and painting ever could, because that’s the way of elven magic.

This fairy had friends who came and did her dishes and other chores, so that she could rest and get better. But she still worked too hard. Then one day, fairy Timothy visited, then a good Christian minister named George, then a dish-washing bird called Blue. They all asked, unbeknownst to each other, “You don’t have any fun, do you?” So she’s throwing a party today and, hence, will start getting healthy.

So, now that you’ve read this sign here on my front door: Welcome! You’re just in time for the party. C’mon in! I’m throwing a bash to kick off a more balanced life. And maybe the festivities’ll help you become more self-caring yourself— if you need that. But we’ll have lots of fun anyway! And I have cocoa! With marshmallows. And cinnamon sticks. And games. And prizes. And everyone gets to take a balloon home!

*****
The above piece is from my upcoming book. Am way busy b/c deadline=deliver manuscript to publisher Feb 2. That’s a few weeks from now! I better keep using elves for role models so that I don’t burn out while wrapping up final parts of the book!

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Old Gods in the Modern World

Posted on December 30, 2010 by Francesca De Grandis

I love the brilliant, fruitful, and diverse thinkers in my community = Here’s a guest blog by Kathi Somers. 

And here’s a fun pic of her. She’s smart and fun.

Old Gods in the Modern World
By Kathi Somers

Many writers and philosophers have speculated that gods exist or become stronger based on the belief expressed in them. By this thinking, whenever we name a deity, we invoke that entity. Therefore, we daily invoke various gods by simply acknowledging them in the names we use for weekdays, months, planets, constellations, etc.

The English-speaking world’s days of the week are simple to recognize, of course. Sunday and Monday are the days, respectively, of the sun and the moon, long worshipped by ancient peoples. Tuesday is for the Norse war god Tyr. Wednesday is Woden’s day (Woden or Odin is chief of the Norse pantheon) and Thursday is Thor’s day (the Norse thunder god and, some believe, the original Santa). Friday is Freya’s (Norse goddess of love and beauty who taught magic to Odin) and Saturday is Saturn’s (Roman god of agriculture).

We also have many words in common use that invoke the gods: Jovial (for the cheerful chief Roman god, Jove, also known as Jupiter); saturnine (for the gloomy Roman god, Saturn); mercurial (for the speedy Roman messenger god, Mercury); music and musing, both of which derive from the nine muses of Greek mythology. These are just a few of the words we use in daily speech that have their origins with the gods.

The old gods have never left us, because we cannot leave them. We belong to each other, we are interdependent, despite the jealous god who wanted us to leave them out. Where is the value in leaving them out? How insipid and empty our world would be without them!

Copyright 2010 by Kathi Somers. All rights reserved.

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Giveaway Expands Me, Out into the Stars

Posted on December 26, 2010 by Francesca De Grandis

Update on the blog that is below: Someone has already claimed the earrings. But come back, lots of other cool stuff happens here: Contests, prizes, deep thoughts, informational rants . . .

*****

Giveaway expands me, out into the stars. Hoarding will contract me. Do you want these garnet and pearl earrings? Free! 

Been simplifying home space, getting rid of stuff, even fabulous stuff. My spirituality and sanity require one of the decluttering laws that you always read about: If you don’t use it, get rid of it.

These earrings were made with sterling silver, white pearls, garnet, and green adventurine hearts. I loooovvveeee them, but was gifted them by a lovely woman in Feb. I finally have to admit, sigh, I don’t wear garnet. I do not honor her gift by letting it sit in a drawer. I honor it by regifting it.

First person to email me their postal address (U. S. only) can have them. I’ll even pay shipping. Pls don’t ask for them if you’re going to take them apart to make something else with their parts. I coulda done that myself – I’m a jewelry maker! But they’re too pretty! I want to honor their maker and her design. Include your ph # in case I have trouble shipping. My email: outlawbunny@outlawbunny.com

Yaya!

Posted in Classes, Books, and Other News, Community, Giveaways and Contests, Spirit, The Whole Thing | Tagged , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Workaholic Elf Takes Care of Self.

Posted on December 22, 2010 by Francesca De Grandis

Synopsis: Workaholic Elf Takes Care of Self. Apply your elven career skills to self-care. Be a Domestic Elf! Be professional about self-care. 

Elves are productive members of society. Santa’s elves, shoemaker’s elves . . .  We industriously display fine craftsmanship: toy makers, jewelers, arborists, mechanics,  sales staff, ethical marketing consultants, and more. 

We love our work, but sometimes we work non-stop, completely ignoring our God-given inclination to immediately drop a project at the sight of snowfall or the scent of fresh baked cookies.

This is my Domestic Elf Pendant. I designed and made it for myself somewhere between 2007-2009. (I hope to make a few more for other domestic elves. It’s a vintage wooden spool I beaded around, but I want to figure out how to integrate cloth into it and have less beadwork. I think it’ll be pretty!) But it’s taken til now to finally thoroughly enjoy wearing it: You can be a Domestic Elf without fully enjoying it. I tend to have more fun when I’m busy as a Santa’s elf, and then wonder what the heck to do on days off.

But recently I applied my elven industriousness to self-care. My mega-datebook keeps track of the personal and professional tasks I need to accomplish day-by-day. On a day off, I went back through the datebook, then spent the day playing catch up, by following through on two week’s worth of datebook entries about self-care. It went really well. I had a merry time, working away at taking care of me, relaxed and happy. 

I’ve been taught that self-care includes two things. One is fun¸ luxurious, or indulgent, e.g., baking a special dessert for myself. The other is the down ‘n’ dirty part of self-care, e.g., making a dentist appointment, or restocking my homeopathy supply – the stuff a mom does for her kids, and that busy grown ups might forget to do for themselves. It is a grown up’s job to be a good mom for him or herself. I can apply my elven industriousness to that job!

Here’s my day-off poem:
Workaholic elf
takes care of self;
busy busy busy day,
loving me in every way.
Time off gives me health and cheer,
to make me strong for YOU TOO, dear! 

I love the busyness and productivity of my work-day, but I hope to also keep applying my industriousness to self-care. Maybe you can use this approach to take care of you.

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What Do Elves Do on Their Day Off?

Posted on December 17, 2010 by Francesca De Grandis

Feb 7, 2011 update on contest below: It was hard to choose a winner. Thank you to everyone for creating a fun time with your posts, which rocked, all were beautiful and heartfelt! I especially thank Jenn AKA The Leftover Queen for kicking things off by being the first entry, and confettijulie for, um, pushing the, um, envelop <blush>. And now, the winner is <drum roll> ROMMY!

I’ll leave the contest below up, b/c it has fun stuff. Stay tuned to my blog: Another contest coming soon. Wheee!

*****

I’m having a contest! It’s easy to enter:

* Elves are so industrious that they may not know what 2 do with themselves when not working!

* Help them out! Use the “Leave a Reply” box at the end of this page to answer my question: What do elves do on their day off?

* Be as brief or as long as you want. Tell me one elven leisure activity or many.

* Make as many entries as you want, if you have new ideas!

* Contest ends Feb 2, 2011.

The best answer wins:

* A Bardic Alchemy CD

* A Pick the Apple from the Tree CD 

* A cool button I made that declares you “Faerie Bard”

* A cool fridg magnet I made. It has glitter and diaphanous cloth in it. Under them, these words peek: “Fairies are subtle. But watch closely for them: they’ll show you the road to your heart’s desire. — Francesca De Grandis”

I made the magnet and button years ago, and really want to give them to someone. b/c I think they rock. But I’m freakishly honest, so I want u 2 know: Their plastic covering is a bit battered.

That’s all the info about entering the contest! But read on for fun! (When I told a friend about asking people what elves do on their day off, she responded, “Elves day off? Hmm. Do they have sex?”)

The contest goes into February: Elves are not just a Holiday topic, no more than joy, wonder, or hope are. And elves stay busy all year, whether they’re Santa’s elves or other elven artisans. They always need ideas on things to do on their breaks!

Below are things this elf – – bunny elf moi – – did on a recent day off.

I put up my Yule tree, aka, altar to Santa. (See Santa Is in My Pantheon.) Yes, I  beaded a slew of miniature ornaments for my tiny tree. I am crazy.

 

I found Yule decor to put on this beautiful lampshade.

 

I put up a Yule silk painting I made for ME. It’s the only one like it! I am WAAAY into crafting OOAK goodies that are just right for me, and just right for my unique Etsy shoppers.Yule Painting by FDG

Then I said my prayers. (It’s important every day.) You can use your Yule Stocking to pray to Santa, any time of year. Yule stockings are magic: Just write down your prayer and put it in. Then believe in Santa! Or make a wish, then gently blow into the stocking. Then believe in Santa!

Here’s my kitty getting ready to make her prayer. All it takes for cats to get their wish is to simply stick their kitty-magic-head in the stocking. Oops, wrong pic. Cats are special: They get to wish right into Santa’s hat.

My gods walk on the earth. They hang out with me on my day off. But Santa had to run off before I could snap his picture. He’s always soo busy: That’s why there are so few photos of him.

I didn’t get to tell him what I want for Yule. But after he left, I wrote a letter to Santa instead.

Then my elf friend, Twinkles, dropped by. He clearly knows something I don’t about Santa’s present to me, but Twinkles wouldn’t tell me. But you can tell it will be a great present: Look at Twinkles’s face! (Click on his pic and u can see his expression!)

Elves’ days off is a topic long dear to me, so I’ll blog more about it soon. LOVE you, FDG

Posted in Art, Writing, and Music, Classes, Books, and Other News, Giveaways and Contests, Spirit, The Whole Thing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 29 Comments

Ten Tips for Creative Dyeing

Posted on December 15, 2010 by Francesca De Grandis

If you don’t dye, apply this blog to poetry, music, healing, or other art. Extrapolate! 

I was not paid to mention Jacquard products in this blog. They’re part of my story. I started dye art by winning their products: Check it out at www.teejuice.com b/c it’s an easy contest to win, and Jacquard is generous with prizes. I honestly adore their products and the folks who work at Jacquard. With that:

Ten Tips for Creative Dyeing 

Dye Art is about letting creativity flow. If someone thinks this article’s pics don’t qualify me to make dyeing suggestions, I’m happy to say I’m a relative novice. I consider that one of my qualifications to give tips. Because I am having a ball. That is what my tips are about: how to have fun and let ideas flows no matter what.

These suggestions are both for someone like me in the early exploration of dye art, or for an old hand who wants to grow creatively. Included are pics of my newbie creative triumphs, to help illustrate what trial and error has taught me about maintaining a smile and fresh ideas at all times, in hopes this’ll help you enjoy dyeing as much as I do. At article’s end are the supplies used for each project.

Tip 1. Use what you have. My dyeing started with one TeeJuice pen from a pal. I got excited about it as a calligraphy tool. Wrote a bedtime story and inked it onto a pillowcase. It’s a good thing I wasn’t in a pity party: I might have moaned, “Poor me. All I have is one black marker. What on earth could I possibly do with THAT?” Luckily I thought, “Wow, lemme see what I can DO with that.” Otherwise, I might never have started dyed, robbing myself of its pleasures.

Tip 2. Don’t try to do it “right.” Who gets to say what’s right, anyway? I don’t have the skill set required to follow patterns or otherwise stick to someone else’s definition of beauty. So I don’t try. This usually turns out well. (I’m probably also temperamentally incapable of doing art someone else’s way, and suspect that my percentage of failures is no higher than it would be if I abided by patterns and group-consensus aesthetic.) YOU say what is right for your own art. E.g., The pillowcase had white on white embroidery. I traced it, but took care not to do so slavishly. Instead I maintained my own style, as well as using the embroidery as a jumping off point for whatever I felt like drawing. For me, trying to trace “right” would’ve made stiff unattractive lines. I rarely do dyeing that is stenciled, traced, or otherwise copied; it is almost always my designs. This is partially out of necessity!

Tip 3. If your initial work on a piece looks awful, keep going anyway. My first attempt to paint silk was a disaster. I tried a scarf. It has cardboard stuck to the resist in back and blobs of resist everywhere. It will NOT be sold at Sak’s. But I love my beautiful mess.

Not at first, though. I started by applying resist all wrong to the white scarf. And saw NO redeeming value in the mess I’d made. But I kept going, because silk costs money. This had two benefits. Assuming the scarf was ruined, I was free to continue my first silk painting, just to learn. I learn best by doing. Two: I ended up loving the scarf’s design and stunning Green Label Silk Dyes colors. My beautiful mess adorned a table at a recent event. It cheered me throughout the day.

New at dyeing, I’m not new at creative endeavors. (The trial ‘n’ error lessons herein were by and large learned long ago, as a musician and poet. Mostly, I’m just having to remember them for dyeing.) Initial stages may make a poem, song, dance, silk painting, (fill in the blank) seem doomed, but if you keep at it, something fabulous can blossom.

Tip 4. If a piece doesn’t work out, don’t throw it away. Add to it instead. Maybe it just doesn’t look right YET. Start adding to it. Add color. Or add something to a larger portion of the blank than you already have. (Blanks are plain surfaces you dye, such as a scarf or tee-shirt.) Add tiny shapes between big shapes you’ve already made. Add bigger shapes. Blur some of the dye. Perhaps KEEP on adding. Play. Next comes another approach for a project that doesn’t work out:

Tip 5.  Don’t toss a failed project. Let it sit a while. I had an idea: Give a silk scarf broad sweeps of autumn colors, then draw fall leaves over it with TeeJuice. So I tried tie-dye for the first time, hoping for tie-dye high couture. It came out more tie-dye high hippie.

The scarf sat for a week, while I went ahead with other projects. Luckily, I hadn’t set the dye (I’d used Green Label Silk Dyes colors). One day, I wrapped up a project and had a bit of dye left. I figured, “What the heck,” reached for the scarf, and dipped its ends into the dye. Pretty! Over the next few days, there was leftover dye a few more times. I dipped parts of the scarf I didn’t like into it. This blurred colors and lines, improving the tie dye patterns. Now the scarf has the autumnal background I want.

Letting a disappointing project sit awhile gives solutions the chance to bubble up from your subconscious. Or you might happen on an article that solves your problem. Take a break from a troublesome undertaking, and there are a million ways the right answer might just come along.

 Tip 6. Go with the flow. Confettijulie told me recently that dyeing is an inexact art. You can’t predict the results. I’ve found this to be true of any art form. You have to work around mistakes and surprises. They can be guideposts instead of roadblocks. Mistakes often become the best part of a design. These sneakers are an attempt at damage control. I made white sneakers pink with Green Label Silk Dye. Apparently, it is not for dyeing cotton. Confettijulie does that with great results. However, I painted TeeJuice leaves to cover my blotchy uneven dye job. Wearing my new sneaks will make me smile. Going with the flow, seeing mistakes and surprises as design elements, can produce amazing results. Art is a roller coaster ride. Let go and lean into the curves.

Tip 7. Try different dyes. I ADORE TeeJuice. Among other things, it is helping me realize that I can draw! (This is a huge realization for me. Happy me!) Try different types of dyes because one of them might be the exact thing you need to free your inner artist.

Tip 8. Choose the right dye for the job. TeeJuice is my favorite, but I need a more fluid medium for some projects. Using TeeJuice for them will make it impossible to accomplish what I envision. More important, it might leave me thinking that the reason I can’t execute the project is that I am just a crummy artist, inherently lacking any skill needed.

I am going to try Dye-Na-Flow. I heard it flows more than TeeJuice and less than Green Label Dyes, which are too loose for the project at hand. (You can dilute TeeJuice, but it won’t set if you use more than one part water to three parts TeeJuice. Being sure I dilute no more than 25% is too distracting for me when I paint.) But how do you know the right dye for your project? Read the next tip. (Later Note: I tried Dye-Na-Flow. Great stuff, but very flowy – just like its name! So am still looking for something that flows more than TeeJuice but less than Green Label Dyes.)

Tip 9. Ask how-to questions. I hound two friends who are skilled fabric artisans (their respective sites are www.confettijulie.etsy.com and www.floraspond.etsy.com). They’ve shaved endless hours off my learning curve and forestalled major frustration. Read up on dyeing, but there’s no substitute for picking the brain of a person who has years of experience. Or a beginner might happen to know the exact info you lack. If you don’t have dye-buddies, check out the Jacquard forum at www.jacquardproducts.com/forums where a plethora of know-how is available for the asking. (Like I said, I’m madly, utterly, ridiculously in love with everything Jacquard. I’m embarrassed by it: Aren’t I supposed to feel this way about a man?)

Tip 10. Use the best supplies you can afford. Otherwise, you might think your artistry is lacking when, in fact, your tools aren’t up to snuff. (This closing tip contradicts the first one. Go figure.) I did my first TeeJuice drawing on quality vintage cloth. Later, I made a similar effort on cheap muslin. The latter drawing looks so poor that, had I done the muslin first, I would never have known what I was capable of. I would have thought I didn’t have the artistic aptitude needed and maybe never dyed again. Net result would’ve been the loss of a lot of pleasure and self-expression. The belief that you completely lack skill or even potential for art can be devastating if you long to be creative. But poor tools can leave you thinking that trying to develop skill is a waste of time in your case. Spare yourself. This tip was hard won. Though I was considered “artistic” in the visual arts as a child, my folks didn’t know enough to buy me art supplies. I grew up in a neighborhood where none of us had them. Using good dyes and blanks has helped teach me I am more capable at visual arts than I had thought. Now, I can’t wait to see where my fabric art adventure will go.

Enjoy dyeing to the max: Let dye, fun, and creativity flow!

Outlaw Bunny taught herself to play guitar at age fourteen, then immediately started performing in a major metropolitan area’s clubs. She’s toured the U.S., released a best-selling music album, and taught creative process to newbies and pros in a variety of artistic fields. She believes we’re all skilled artists, given the right genre and right support. When Multiple Sclerosis made holding a guitar too difficult, she took up mandolin, and plays tunes not in its usual repertoire. Her focus also shifted to freeform three-dimensional bead-weaving. Sign up for announcements of upcoming classes in creative process, applicable to any art form: www.outlawbunny.com/mailing.html  

The supplies below (except for pillowcase and sneakers) can be found through www.jacquardproducts.com or 800-442-0455.

1) Top photo: detail from silk painting of foliate face on 9&1/2” silk hoop, using Green Label Silk Dyes and Black Waterbased Resist

2) My Beautiful Mess: silk scarf with Green Label Silk Dyes and Black Waterbased Resist

3) Autumnal Silk scarf: Green Label Silk Dyes and TeeJuice

4) Tennis sneakers rescued by TeeJuice

5) TeeJuice on Pillowcase

6) Detail of silk painting on a 9&1/2’ silk hoop: Green Label Silk Dyes and Gold Waterbased Resist

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Santa Is in My Pantheon

Posted on December 12, 2010 by Francesca De Grandis

This is a portrait I painted of Santa. It’s not the usual, but I know what I’m doing: Santa is in my pantheon. He’s my Faerie Santa, a real honest-to-god Faerie. (Scroll past him for rest of blog.)

And he comes to my house, Santa comes to see me! My gods are so accessible, they often walk on earth. We had the best visit. It was nice to just hang out. We are so busy when we are at work (I’m one of his elves). Here’s an actual photo of him. Isn’t he handsome? 

I pray to Santa any time of the year.  Started this after a girlfriend told me she does that. She has an altar to him—milk and cookies for ol’ St. Nick. A few days ago, we had a religious ceremony. It consisted of her reading me The Night before Christmas. Then we sat silently for a moment, to enjoy how that left us feeling.  A simple rite! Since I am one of his elves, it was a great way to start the day. 

I was praying to him the other day, and he told me that we who are his elves should not let people know, so, SSSHHH. (But I am saying I’m one of his elves to promote my elven wares, b/c no one believes me, except OTHER elves. So maybe u can talk about it, too, for your own reasons. People think it’s just a metaphor!) 

You may think I’m fibbing or crazy but, after months making things the old-fashioned hand-crafted way to fill Santa’s sleigh (AKA my Etsy shop ), I know I’m his elf. Who better than someone who works in many different mediums and is the official Upcycling Queen? Do you think that was too proud a thing to say? Elven pride, yaya!  

Francesca

Santa’s are not the only skilled elves known for our productivity. There are the shoemaker’s elves, and the elves who tidy homes when no one is looking. Elves are useful members of society. 

But this manic time of North Pole busyness!  Constantly busy elf til Santa fills his sleigh! Then things back to normal. Well, they’ll be a bit more mellow: We elves are always busy. But there’ll be more time for cocoa and rest. For now, working hard, committed to making my Etsy shop work and to making real magic for people’s holidays. Fey fashions and mystic décor have to be made just so. Whew oh Whew! A joy, but also lot of work. 

Santa and my other rascal oh-so-pagan Gods of bounty come thru when needed! The Etsy shop is helping me pay a few bills, no small thing between our current economy and my health’s impact on my earning ability. Things are hand to mouth, but I don’t think that that shows my gods to be weak. They just want to keep me in the moment. 

Yeah, economically, it’s a mad dance: kind of like the Mad Hatter managing to always stay one seat ahead of Alice at the tea party. Or, just as much, it’s like Alice trying to deal with him. I never know what the economy and politicians might do to grab the seat out from under me. Or grab the tea cup (or cup of cocoa) I’m about to sip from. Maybe that’s why I enjoy being an elf so much: Staying busy keeps me in the moment, peaceful, useful, dwelling in wonder. Sometimes all we can do is stay one step ahead but, hey, as long as you’re ahead, what does it matter? Worrying about tomorrow’s cup of tea never helped anyone. 

Being busy is a balm to many things, especially if you’re busy being of service doing what you love. For example, crafting helps heal past wounds. While lost in my world of making things for the shop, I’m one step ahead of the Mad Hatter at Alice’s tea party. (Or I’m the Mad Hatter one step ahead of everyone and everything!) 

Wahoo! I’m a busy happy elf, making magic for you, making magic for me. Tinkering is elven play: My joy fills everything I make! Busy busy BUUUSY elf. 

Did you know elves get to dress exactly as they want! Check it out. I designed this skirt and hat. And dyed the white silk leggings red. I’m sulking in the pic b/c we’re out of cocoa. Yes, even elves get moody sometimes. 

In fact, don’t ever put unrealistic demands on Twinkles – one of my fellow elves in the workshop. He’s an expert at building wooden toys, but if you’re unreasonable about your expectations . . . well, he’ll still smile with authentic jolly elf-ness, but the twinkle in his eye teasingly says, “Oh, c’mon!” I managed to snap a pic when Twinkles was doing just that. 

Here’s another elf pic. One of my friends asked me to paint his portrait. (He is sooo cute!)  

Been jabbering lots about Santa and moi lately, so it was fun to repeat a bit of it here, and add a little. I could fill a book talking about elf life (and may have actually written that much about it, over time) because being one impacts everything I do. It’s part of my work, my play, my spirituality. It’s a lighthearted thing for me, and a deep thing for me. Because it’s me! So I appreciate you reading this tiny piece of my elf life! Oh, speaking of which, you can be both a bunny and an elf! 

Below is the famous New York Sun 1897 letter, “Yes, Virginian there Is a Santa Claus.” If he is real, it proves his elves are! The letter also shares remarkable mysticism. I believe the letter’s in public domain. If you know otherwise, please tell me, so I can remove it from this site. I respect copyright law. 

Happy Yule! 

***** 

Dear Editor,
I am eight years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus. Papa says “If you see it in the Sun it’s so.” Please tell me the truth, is there a Santa Claus? 

Virginia O’Hanlon.
Answer: VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except [what] they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men’s or children’s, are little. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge. 

Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished. 

Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies! You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if they did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that’s no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world. 

You may tear apart the baby’s rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding. 

No Santa Claus! Thank GOD! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.

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Staying Calm midst Holiday Madness

Posted on December 9, 2010 by Francesca De Grandis

Home for the Holidays 

The phrase “home for the holidays” causes a wide range of reactions. For one person, it might elicit cherished memories of Mom’s freshly baked cookies, still warm out of the oven. For another person, the phrase might strike something akin to terror in the heart, because the holidays were always a time of family squabbles. However, for almost all of us, this time of year tends to be overwhelmingly busy and at least a little dizzying.

So I decided to play with the phrase. What if “home for the holidays,” along with everything else it might mean, also implied that you felt at home in yourself? In other words, during the season’s hustle and bustle, what if you had a place inside yourself where the season was exactly what you wanted, even if only for a minute? 

Examples: Perhaps you’re someone who likes to ignore the holidays. Then for you being home might mean being serenely oblivious of all the holiday hubbub. If you’re someone for whom spirituality is important, then “home for the holidays” might mean focusing on serving others, or being in tune with what nature is doing this time of year. 

One way to find your inner home is to ask yourself what’s important to you. In this particular instance, I don’t mean what’s important in your life overall, but what’s vital to you right now, this month. Come up with one thing. Then find one thing you can do to embody the truth, priority, or other answer you gave yourself. Don’t worry if all you come up with is the tiniest act, attitude, or . . .  Better something than nothing at all. 

The one important thing I choose is to find wonder. My reasons: Wonder is important, it lifts the spirits, which is needed midwinter. Finding our inner wonder provides us with a sanity-inducing touchstone midst Dec’s madness. 

Being so busy busy busy with my Etsy shop, one thing I will do to find wonder is to keep reminding myself that I’m one of Santa’s busy busy busy elves, spending months making things the old-fashioned hand-crafted way to fill his sleigh, so that everyone gets truly magical gifts this Yule. This makes me enjoy my work sooooo much! (Yes, a bunny can so too be an elf!)

Love love love love love, and jingle bells, FDG  P.S . The above blog is an update of a piece I wrote 2006, which felt appropriate to share again, with a little update!

Maxim and Painting by Outlaw Bunny

Maxim and Painting by Outlaw Bunny

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Crisis Pie: A Self Help Recipe

Posted on December 1, 2010 by Francesca De Grandis

Today’s blog = wisdom culled from the kitchen (I love to mock me), dessert emergency, & loss of spiritual balance, plus recipe for pie made with cherry fruit spread. I wrote this piece years back, but was polishing it for a book I’m working on, and finally just had to share it now. It is about what happened to me one Thanksgiving, but I think it – and the pie recipe involved – are equally valid for Christmas day.

 Crisis Pie (When You Suddenly Discover Your Guest Is Allergic to Mincemeat)

A kitchen is a healthily sane place to be. Inner growth needn’t always be hard work; pleasure heals! So here’s some culinary self-help.

The evening before Thanksgiving, I foolishly phoned a guest to ask her if there’s any kind of pie she hated. “Mincemeat” was the answer.

“Damn,” I thought, “I should have known better than to call her. Now that I think of it, the ingredients for anything but mincemeat pie aren’t here!”

Housebound with my disabilities, I couldn’t run to the store to pick up something last minute. And it didn’t seem appropriate to ask one of my friends to do it, Thanksgiving guest included, because they all do plenty for me already because of my health-induced limits.

So I freaked out and, in a panic, improvised the following with what I had on hand.

Ingredients

pie crust, in a 9 inch glass pie plate since you need the depth
3 tablespoons melted butter
1 cup unsweetened apple sauce
1 cup walnuts that have been broken up a bit
1 vanilla bean
2 tablespoons Welch’s frozen white grape juice concentrate
cherry fruit spread or cherry jam
1 egg
pinch of salt

* Step 1: Continue to freak out about the holiday menu, because it’s just one of those stupid things we humans do at Thanksgiving.

* Then bake a pie crust for about five minutes at 375º. (If you want, use ground hazelnuts for part of the crust. Don’t worry if that makes the crust fall apart when you’re serving. There’ll be hazelnuts in it, so no one’ll care!)

* While the crust’s cooling, and you ponder that this dessert issue isn’t really a crisis – a heartless health-care system is a crisis – mix together the melted butter, apple sauce, and walnuts. Let that sit (because you have other stuff to do. Maybe the mixture will gain something by waiting for you. However, if you have a co-chef, then she or he can mix the applesauce blend while you do the following.)

* Preheat the oven to 350°.

* Cut about two inches off a vanilla bean and snip it into the tiniest pieces. I use scissors. As you snip, let the pieces fall into the white grape juice concentrate, which should be in a microwave safe bowl.

* Heat this mixture in the microwave for 35 seconds.

* While the bean steeps in the warmed juice concentrate, spread a thin layer of cherry fruit spread (cherry jam’s fine, too) over the cooled crust. (It would have been apricot fruit spread, but I couldn’t open the jar. I figure the apricot jar’s lid being stuck was the way that God, who is all-knowing, implemented Her fabulous decision of cherry instead, a better choice – it tasted wonderful!) The cherries in the fruit spread were not entirely mashed but marvelously whole or in pieces. If I had spread the jam evenly, so that it was all as thick as the cherries, my guests would’ve ended up eating cloying mouthfuls of jam. So I spread quite unevenly, transparent cherry smears between the actual cherries. Therefore, the whole bottom was covered, but delicately so between the fruit bits.

* Beat an egg with a pinch of salt.

* Add the vanilla infusion – bits of vanilla bean and all – to the apple sauce mix.

* Right before you stick the pie in the oven, add the egg (I was afraid the egg would curdle otherwise).

* Bake at 350° for 35 minutes.

* Keep an eye on it. If the edge of the crust browns too quickly, put a strip of aluminum foil around the pie’s edge, covering it. I called my friend Diana, because I didn’t want to get whatever that icky thing is that raw eggs give you. She promised me that 35 minutes at 350° would leave me icky-thing free. You may want to check that yourself. In any case, let the pie cool before eating. That way it can cook (and solidify) more.

“So,” I mused after the pie had finished baking, “it doesn’t matter how the pie turns out. Making it was fun, and that averted the crisis.” The crisis, you see, wasn’t what we had for dessert. My panic was the crisis, and it was solved by two things. The first was the calm feeling I got from a creative, relaxing playtime in the kitchen. The second was the sense of perspective brought on by the idea of a bad health-care system.

The lessons I got: Half of life’s little ups and downs aren’t crises. However our reactions to them can be. And sometimes changing our feelings can be hard work. But other times, you can simply do something that’s nurturing to body and/or soul, the way culinary activities are for me. Garden, repot plants, make love, tap dance, write a plan to stop world hunger – do something that enriches you and perhaps others.

By the way – the pie was heaven.

Oops – I forgot three things.
* Baking instructions: I accidentally had it up higher than 350° for a bit first. For what that info is worth.
* And it might be nice if the center came out more firm, if that wouldn’t burn the edge (which eventually I did put tin foil on to keep from burning).
* I suggest you do a trial run on this dessert before you serve it to company. I’m concerned that my instructions aren’t quite right. But I wanted to share the recipe best I could, especially so that I could give you the story that accompanies it. I’d love to hear your ideas on how to make my instructions about this pie better, or insure it be egg-ickiness free, or other improvements.

Yule Wreath Silk Painting by Francesca De Grandis
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