Not the rug pulled out from beneath me
but the floor gone,
nothing holding me from falling
into endless irredeemable deprivation.
There came a point when there was
absolutely nothing except the nothing to which
I had to surrender
if I was to find more power, beauty, and joy than ever,
and if I was not to live in fear.
Terrorized by the possibility of no security,
I had grasped at magic bullets
—the right friend, enough money, the perfect solution,
feeling utter connection to my Gods—
though no substance, image, or Divine elation
could replace diving into the floor-less flawless depths
of my unknowing and the future’s uncertainties.
I had to understand this eerie fall is not necessarily
into the aforementioned abyss of hardship.
There came a point when there was nothing,
except the nothing into which I dove—
instead of dangling perilously from
substance, image, or bliss—
because the barren vacuum had become the place I could
know my Gods and myself fully,
give myself over to life that I might serve life,
and allow the void to bear abundance and all other blessings to me, if it will. Hah!
Dear reader, if my above thoughts about spiritual surrender resonate with your belief system, please check out my event that starts January 16, 2021—Shamanic Rituals that Fill the Spiritual Void: https://outlawbunny.com/2021/11/03/shamanic-rituals-that-fill-the-spiritual-void/