Here’s what I wrote earlier today: Did vanity search. LOL! People repeat the same erroneous info about me and are upset I don’t say, “I’m deeper than anyone else, and I know secrets no one else knows. I can teach you to be pompous just like me.” LOL. They couldn’t spot a mystery or the Goddess if she was doing a rhumba in front of them. God, I’m laughing! Bitter people! I feel for them but can’t stop laughing. Thank God I’m such a fool, or their attacks would make me bitter, too! I’d “catch” their bitterness.
A bit later I wrote: On a sober note, I’m sad – actually sad in my heart – that some people think disdain makes them look spiritually superior and virtuous. Hate is not a virtue, and their attacks make me feel lonely. There’s so much to celebrate and laugh about in life; I wish they’d just come laugh with me! We could laugh at our faults together! I am a lonely fool, needing all the fellow fools possible!
Later still: After my laughter, I ended up feeling hurt by the same things I’d been able to rise above with laughter earlier in the evening. And I got fearful their condemnation of my writing was correct, which got me confused about how to do the final edits on the book that I need to have finished in a few days. I’m past that emotional upset and insecurity now. I hope I stay past it.
These critics measure Shamanism (mysticism, spirituality, etc.) by form, not content. They were just parroting each other, and they don’t know that 100s of readers have thanked me for helping them completely change – even save – their lives. I wish people understood that public figures are human; mean words hurt us. For one thing, for a while I was really starting to think my writing is terrible and lost confidence in the book I’ve been working on since 2003.
I thank the Divine, for helping me cleave to You and my friends, and for making me remember that the fruits of someone’s work show it’s worth. (How worthwhile can their criticisms be, if all it provides is nastiness and misinformation?) Please help me finish the last of the rewrites without those terrible, mean people’s remarks inside my head, muddying my mind and making me incapable of doing the final rewrites well. Help me do final rewrites that serve You and whoever reads the book. Thank you!
Finally, I wrote this, to expand on an earlier point: People who explore mysticism, integrative vision, shamanism, Wicca, the Faerie Faith, an ecstatic path, etc., usually seek depth. Unfortunately, (it really is sad) they sometimes wrongly think they have found the right teacher, mistaking the teacher’s anger, arrogance, or power-tripping for depth. Do not let these errant seekers make you must mistrust yourself or your choices. And I won’t let them make me doubt myself either, okay? Some of the most powerful mystics, shamans, and the likes are people whose power is so subtle, runs so deep, and is so confident that they just seem like “fluffy bunnies.” In the right circumstances, they say very impressive things. But most of the time, they don’t, because they know that it cheapens sacred experiences if you discuss them just to have something to fill the silence. And they know that to, instead, hint at wondrous secrets is just as wrong; a secret you brag about isn’t much of a secret; a mystery you brag about dissipates. And they don’t endlessly expound on the meanings of mystic images and other esoterica. Buddha would not even discuss cosmology or theory with a student; he felt that it did not leave sufficient time for actual practice of the path. Most of the time, it’s not one’s words that show one’s depth. It is one’s energy, one’s bearing, etc. I trust bunnies, I trust laughing fools. I pray to the Divine, help me love people who do really stupid hurtful things because they think such actions are spiritual. We’re all on this path together, learning, and growing. Thank you.
Gotta add: I hate that they were implying that beginners don’t have the depth of perception needed to make sound judgments. That is so condescending and invalidating. As I said, they’re mad at me because I don’t preach, “I’m better than you, but study with me and you can be better than everyone else too!” Goddess bless them, god bless them, god bless them. We’re all fools in our own ways.
Haters gonna hate Francesca. But those you’ve helped and you yourself know the truth of the good you’ve done…that’s all that counts in the end.
If you get down again about the haters again, take a listen to this peppy little song 🙂 It’s a mood lifter, and remember, there’s a good bit of jealousy that initiates trash talk
I loved that vid. I cried happy tears, thank u! The guy dancing in a wheelchair was an extra bonus. Next time I ask, “Do ya wanna dance?” maybe the response won’t be to grab my wheelchair without asking, and wheel me around the dance floor, injuring me. And I couldn’t yell “No” to be heard above the music, because yelling would injure me anyway. No one should move a wheelchair even an inch without asking first. A crip is not a bag of groceries. And I break at the drop of a hat. I can’t count the times someone, even strangers, grabbed my chair, injuring me. It is a typical event in a crip’s life, which is why I am going on about it. All that aside: Then, she made the loser sign above his head, and I got deliriously happy. That one gesture was a powerful lesson about the marginalization of crips! Wahoo, I will watch this again, crip stuff aside!! What a joyful vid!
Wow guys, I feel you really have my back! The funny thing is, the site full of people trashing me: one thing they said to discredit me was that only beginners like my work, implying that newbies don’t know better but that the critical people on that site, being such advanced beings, knew that I wasn’t very good. Which is so funny, because almost all my students are my peers. They’re either advanced practitioners of shamanism or the like or, though new to spiritual development in an overt way, are deeply spiritual. Or they have such enormous integrity and self-awareness that, in their careers, they’re players on an international field. Or are otherwise just amazing and perceptive people.
Sarah, since u’r new to my blog, I am really glad you got the shifting emotions. I was concerned that someone might be confused by that instead of understanding it the way you guys obviously do. Sarah, your comments were worded exquisitely! You get me, yay! This is one bunny you can hug anytime.
Sandy, feel free to defend me! Some of you know about the really bad gossip campaign years ago, and that I refused to defend myself against it, because I thought staying silent was taking the high moral grounds. I no longer believe that. Not all the time. When I get letters from, for example, somebody in the US Armed Forces in Iraq, who tells me that one of my books is helping him keep it together there, I know that I have an obligation to defend myself against naysayers. Otherwise, people whom my books might support listen to the naysayers on social media and figure that my books are not worth the effort. Also, I’ve come to realize that, as a child of God, I am worth defending!!
I also kept silent because I thought no on wld believe gossip, but it was all some people saw when trying to make a decision about me or my classes.
So please do defend me! it’s so hard to ask you for that. Years ago during that bad gossip, I actually told everyone to not defend me!
I think my students and readers are often so inner focused and private that they don’t say as much in social media as naysayers. It might be harder for my support system to open up online. But if you feel that it’s right for you, please support me directly or indirectly. By indirectly, I mean simply sharing your experiences with me and my work, in social media where me and people like me are discussed. By directly I mean defending me when you see the nastiness.
It is hard for me to ask for this support. Thanks again for all your wonderful words; I need them. Love to u all!!!!!
~*Oh, Francesca! I love you! My loyalties run deep when I love someone, and my first response to your pain was to grab up a broadsword and lop off all their heads! Who are these ignorants that know nothing of the Real You?! Star-drenched, Fey beauty; teacher and friend. You speak my language, woman! And, I’m not the only one! We are a tribe, and we are traveling together right now; just like you said, learning and growing. Honoring ourselves and each other in that process. Remember there are many who have your back.
Dang, this anger totally catapulted me out of my anxiety. Which is cool, but I’m going to need prayer to get to a place of compassion and forgiveness for the beings in this World that wouldn’t know Truth if it hit them with a brick. I don’t want to “catch” their bitterness either!
~*Hugs, Light and Love, Dear One ~
You seem to have been going through a whole specter of emotions!
That’s a rare gift, many are limited. Because they don’t want to be vulnerable they stick to one or two emotions and hide behind them. But most have not been introduced to bunnies! A bunny will make you soft, you feel the beating of it’s heart, an echo of your own. You know then that you are within and without and therefor there is no need/point in hiding behind anything emotions, words, jugments…we are all one.
Do I make any sense at all?
We’re not on the same path but we’ve got the same destination.
We all try to make sense of the universe but our paths are different. Some to convince themselves they’re on the right path feel the need to criticize the road others have chosen. That is a shame but to be expected.
When in doubt hug a bunny.
PS: I’m new to your blog/ world/ thoughts, I think I’m going to enjoy discovering you!