I want people to get presents
only if they believe in Santa Claus.
Keep Santa in Christmas.
(I could not resist, I just could not resist.)
On a more serious note, I had to make that joke. I am feeling a little paranoid that someone will get mad at me, but it is such a straw man to insist on Christmas remaining Christian when it was originally Yule and, worse, constitutes unkind lies about our holy day, that I had to take the high road and make a joke instead of getting resentful.
Happy holy days, whatever your religion!
Updated November 2023